The evilness that is sugar

I'll be straightforward about this: Sugar is evil.

We all know excessive quantities of sugar is naturally bad for us. It causes obesity and a whole slew of various health problems. I still remember my aunt telling me when I was 9 and again at 13, "Don't put so much sugar in your tea, you'll get diabetes." I can't help but laugh not only at the irony of that statement but how naive the general public is when it comes to thier knowledge of type 1 diabetes. Eating things with lots of sugar doesn't equate to diabetes.

However, once you get diabetes, you crave sugar constantly. You want ice cream, coke, cake, pie, cookies, tarts, donuts, gelato, sorbet, pretty much anything that can spike your blood sugar. So what do I do to stop these cravings? I go to the bakery in the grocery store and I smell everything. Yes, you read correct. I smell the sugar. I go to the pies and take a deep breath, to the cakes, deep breath, the cookies, deep breath, the donut rack, deep breath. Mum thinks I'm crazy, but it works. There's just something about being near it, taking it all in through my nose that causes the craving to go away. I think it starts smelling a little too sweet after the first two deep breaths and by the third one I'm totally over the hankering for sugary products. It's like getting a piece of pie or cake that you really really want really badly and three bites into it you realize you actually didn't want to whole slice. All you wanted was a bite of it. Only problem is, I can't leave the store until I've gone to the bakery and smelled the sugar.

My husband loves this because he can order a dessert when we go out and know in the end he'll be the one eating most of it. The same thing goes for coke. Three swigs into my Dr. Pepper I constantly found myself wondering why I was drinking this poison. Unfortunately, 4 swigs after that I remembered how much I loved it which is why I often called it my sin.

Take today, for example. I'm doing good. I haven't really had to many sugar cravings. I think it's because I try to make sure I have fruit with each meal or as a snack. This way I get fiber, and the frutose can satisfy the sugar craving. But, today. Today, I went to the mall. Food courts do not phase me. I can walk through a food court, sit in it for 5 hours, and not want anything in it. But today. Today, I was in Sephora. Here I am looking at make up when someone passes me and I get a whiff of cinnamon glazed pecans. Now, if this person passed me two more times, I probably would have shaken the craving, but they did not. For the next 20 minutes, that's all I could think of. Cinnamon glazed pecans. My mouth was watering just thinking about it. That's all I wanted and I wanted it really really badly. And of course, I had to give in. I was very logical when I realized I was going to give in. Pecans are nuts, nuts are good for you. Nuts hae protein and omega 3 stuff and can help with blood sugar regulation. Cinnamon also helps with blood sugar regulation. So it cancels out the sugar they use as glaze meaning it won't spike that much. See? This is what happens when diabetics want sugary things, we convince ourselves it's okay. My blood sugar is under 50, so I can totally drink this can of Dr. Pepper. Or I can have a bag of peanut M&Ms or a peanut butter cup because it' protien mixed with carbs and I know that's the right way to bring your blood sugar up when it gets too low.

Luckily, Mum was also with me.

"Mum, if I buy a small bag of nuts, will you have some?"
"Sure."

I knew she would say yes. I mean, who can turn down someone that is willing to share cinnamon glazed pecans with you? Truth is, you can't because deep down inside, you know you wanted to buy some too. You just didn't want to say anything.

This is why I share desserts. I eat less of it which means less sugar, less carbs, a small blood sugar spike.

If I get a craving for something, I usually have the willpower to say no and not indulge. Hell, I've had a hankering for crepes with a thin layer of sugar on top rolled into it's cylinder form for the past 3 months and I have yet to make them or go somewhere that makes them. I can literally hold out months on end. I'm still surprised I haven't gone to dairy queen to get a chocolate cherry blizzard yet because I've been wanting one since June. Same thing goes for the snowcone craving I've had since May. And usually when I finally give in, even after I provide myself with logical reasons why I should induge, I feel guilty. I know better. I know I can't eat these things anymore. Even worse, I hardly ate these foods before the diagnosis. Now, it's all I think about. And it gets worse the minute the oh so sweet smell of sugar hits my nose. It's like I'm a thirsty vampire that can't help but look at the veins of some girls neck watching the blood flow inside trying desperately not to give away that I'm about to suck her blood. I'm a sugar vampire. I'm here to smell your sugar. Mwhahaha.