Today I screwed up. Actually, come to think about it I didn't screw up. I ate breakfast around 9:15, I had lunch around 1:30 and yet 15 minutes after lunch it happened.
Maybe I didn't eat enough even though I thought I did.
The thing about generic insulin is that I take a lot of it. 34 units in the morning, 8 units at dinner and 15 units at night. But the major positive about this schedule is that I don't have to shoot up during lunch. The negative part of this schedule is that if I don't eat within a set time, my blood sugar pretty much dives off a cliff.
Today I collapsed in the bathroom. I have never collapsed due to low blood sugar in the three years I have had it. I was at 23 once and still managed to drive a car, talk, walk, and form logical thoughts. Based on all my research I should have been in a coma or having seizures when it was that low. If I had hit 20, I would have been pretty much dead.
But today was a little bit different. Sure I felt a little shaky, it's one of the first warning mechanisms my body gives me when I go under 99. Then when I got up, I pretty much stumbled to the bathroom feeling dizzy. Dizziness is the second warning that my blood sugar is around 70 -80. But once I got to the bathroom, everything changed. I turned the lights on and I felt blinded. I couldn't focus on anything so I stumbled toward the sink in hopes that leaning on it would help me get out of the fog. And then my knees started to buckle. I kept hitting the counter with my hand fighting my body's need to collapse hoping it would jolt me into a more conscious state. Needless to say, down I went knees hitting the vinyl flooring hard. And that's when I knew my blood sugar was lower than I thought.
I had to muster all the strength I had to crawl 10 ft or more to the fridge. All the while I'm freaking out because there isn't anything sugary in the apartment. Usually we keep candy or juice around the apartment, but I was too tired yesterday from finalizing our options on the house that when we went to get more test strips, I decided grocery shopping could wait. So here I am, on my hands and knees trying to crawl to the fridge hoping I'll make it there in time because Bryan is in his chem class and I'm all alone and the last thing I want is for him to come home from class and find a dead or passed out Michelle looking like she is desperately trying to open the fridge door. We can't afford another hospitalization.
Crawling on cold vinyl floor hurts. Battling the need to stop and collapse as you do this hurts mentally, physically, and psychologically. It's like your are fighting to live. But I made it in time, obviously, because if I didn't I'm pretty sure I would not be typing this horrible side of hypoglycemia and diabetes. I looked at the bottom two rows of the fridge since I couldn't stand up or reach that far and found the homemade lemon icing I made and took from Mum's. It was originally part of the lemon cookies I made before I DKAed and I took it home to glaze the lemon pound cake Mum made for me. With determination I popped open the lid and used my finger to scoop up the icing. My endo had warned me that in some cases, hypoglycemia makes it hard to swallow so I ended up rubbing 3 fingerfulls of the icing behind my teeth.
At sat there waiting to feel stronger for a few minutes, used the fridge to help me get up and walked into the living room to check my blood sugar. 51. 51 after eating icing. This is not good.
I already know I will have to stock up on candy, chocolate, cookies, ice cream, soda, and juice today. While I was in the hospital, if my blood sugar was low it stayed that way for the rest of the day despite eating fruit, drinking juice, and eating ice cream. Right now I'm eating fruit snacks. In an hour I have to go to work and something tells me I'm going to stop at Starbucks and get me a frappuchino or a baked good. Something with a lot of sugar to make sure I last through the massage and front desk work.
Either way, I don't like this feeling and I don't like collapsing or crawling. Sometimes I feel like low blood sugar is more villianous than high blood sugar.
(Edit 2/1/12: I'm not eating enough carbs during breakfast which is causing my blood sugar to bottom out. I have two options: a) eat more carbs or b) reduce the amount of units I take.)
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